Based on his most recent e-mail, "Everything looks good -- I'll get back to you so we can move this forward"--everything points to a probable sale. You feel so relaxed, happy, and hopeful. Then a couple of days go by with no phone call or e-mail. You tell yourself, "He's probably busy. I know he'll get in touch tomorrow." But tomorrow comes and goes with no word.

You start to panic. Your self-talk turns negative: "I can't believe this...This is really starting to hurt...He let me believe it was a sure thing...I trusted him...now he's disappeared on me, and I was counting on this sale..." The relaxed, happy feeling is gone. You've fallen victim to "hopeium " again.

Have you been in this situation before?

Of course you have--we all have, and it's painful. So, can you keep from getting dropped? Yes--With the new mindset, you can abandon the salesperson role and come from a place of integrity that stems directly from your personal brand that doesn't compromise your authentic self. This opens communication with your potential clients so you can learn the truth about their situation--and that's what you always want.

These suggestions will help:

* Don't assume the sale. Potential clients are used to the traditional buyer-seller relationship, so they may decide not to tell you things that might make them vulnerable to you. Until you're sure you know the complete truth, you can never assume the sale.

* Keep making it easy for potential clients to tell you their truth. Toward the end of your conversation, ask, "Do you have any more questions?" If potential clients say no, follow up with the 100-percent-final truth-gathering question: "Now, are you 100 percent sure that there's nothing else that I can do on my end to make you feel more comfortable with this situation?" You'll be amazed how often people then say, "Well, actually, there is one more issue..." And it's at that point that you really start to hear their truth.

* Call back to get the truth, not close the sale. Most potential clients who suddenly "disappear" will be expecting you chase them down by calling them and saying, "Hi, I was just wondering where things are at?" Instead, eliminate all sales pressure by telling them that you're okay with their decision not to move forward, based on their not having called you back. In other words, take a step backward. Most of the time, it'll open the door to a new level of open, trusting communication.

* Reassure potential clients that you can handle a "no." Of course we'd rather not hear a "no." But the only way to free yourself and your clients from subtle sales pressures is to let them know that it's not about the sale but about the best choice for them--and if that means no sale, it's okay, because it's ultimately not about you but about them.

* Ask for feedback. Whenever potential clients "disappear," call them back (e-mail them if you have to, but only as a last resort because dialogue is always better) and simply ask, "Would you please share your feedback with me as to how I can improve for next time? Now that our sales process is over, I'm committed to understanding where I went wrong." This is not being feeble or weak -- it's being humble, which often triggers the truth.

* Don't try to "close" a sale. If your intuition tells you that the sales process isn't going in the direction it should be going - which is always toward greater trust and truth--trust those feeling. Then, make it safe for potential clients to tell you where they stand. It's simple--all you have to say is, "Where do you think we should go from here?" (But be prepared: you might not want to hear the truth of how they're feeling. You can cope with this by keeping your larger goal in mind, which is always to establish that the two of you have a "fit.")

* Give yourself the last word. Eliminate the anxiety of waiting for the final calls that will tell you whether the sale is going to happen--instead, schedule a time for getting back to each other. This eliminates chasing. Simply suggest, "Can we plan to get back to each other on a day and at a time that works for you--not to close the sale, but to simply bring closure regardless of what you decide. I'm okay either way, and that'll save us from having to chase each other."

You'll find that these suggestions make selling much less painful because you learn to focus on the truth instead of the sale.

With a Masters Degree in Instructional Design and over a decade of experience creating breakthrough sales strategies for global companies such as UPS and QUALCOMM, Ari Galper discovered the missing link that people who sell have been seeking for years.

His profound discovery of shifting one's mindset to a place of complete integrity, based on new words and phrases grounded in sincerity, has earned him distinction as the world's leading authority on how to build trust in the world of selling.

Leading companies such as Gateway, Clear Channel Communications, Brother International and Fidelity National Mortgage have called on Ari to keep them on the leading edge of sales performance. Visit http://www.unlockthegame.com to get his free sales training lessons.

RELATED ARTICLES The Key to Driving Sales is Understanding What Not How What does it take to make a sale lately?In Sales, we used to focus on the "Sales Cycle." Maybe you still do? The problem with the traditional definition of the 'Sales Cycle' is that it is focused on YOU and not on your prospect. Unleash Your Inner Sales Superstar & Win More Business Right Now! It's a rainy afternoon on a typical mid week afternoon and the telesales team isn't firing on all cylinders. Cedric really isn't pulling his weight at all. Increase Your Selling Confidence 1. Be on time. Turning Sales Techniques Into Sales Success! The goal of all sales training is not just to teach solid selling principles and techniques, but to actually help participants increase the number of new accounts (products and/or services) they sell and improve their multiple sales ratios. Unfortunately, many sales and service industry professionals gain an intellectual awareness of the methods of selling from the sales training they receive, yet fail to improve their bottom line sales results by systematically using the concepts in their daily transactions. How to Sell a Feeling To be totally in tune with the needs of your customers or prospective customers you have to listen to them. Listen to them - it sounds easy enough to do but not everybody gets it right. Elearning Is Dead - Long Live Blended Learning! There is little doubt that eLearning has not achieved the success it promised some ten years ago, even though the primary benefits in terms of cost and flexibility remains extremely attractive. Some of the mistakes that have been made are:1. The Myth of the Natural Born Sales Wonder When I researched the field of using personality inventories to determine future sales success potential, I found the following flaws in their application and interpretation:1. Personality researchers assume that people are predisposed to sales and that there exists an 'ideal' sales personality. The Pipeline: Curious, Desperate, Inspired? You do have a "Pipeline" don't you? You know, the directional map of how you're going to encourage complete strangers to part with their money to buy what you're selling!If you don't have one, you should let us know - we'll send you a picture - just pop an email to leanpipeline@aweber.com with "Send Me The Pipeline - I'm Missing Out!" in the subject line!You know how it is, sometimes, even when everything else seems to fit, you'll pick up a prospect that really isn't suited to you. Get Tough You deal with rejections, frustrations, disappointment, and possibly disrespect on a daily basis. You probably experience more emotional ups and downs than most other professionals. Customers Want You to Ask for the Money Many years ago, I was the one starting a small business. I ran a part-time resume service out of my New York apartment. Follow-Up Marketing: How to Win More Sales with Less Effort A study done by the Association of Sales Executives revealed that 81% of all sales happens on or after the fifth contact. If you're a small business owner and you're only doing one or two follow-ups imagine all the business you're losing. Equal Chance of Winning The Sale? Bah! Are you going to win this deal? With just less than 3 weeks left in December, I am sure that you are really busy closing out your year-end sales. This has been a tough year for many people. Date Your Customer! Yes, you heard me right; I said "Date your clients!" Just think about it for a moment-what did you do when you first met your significant other?You probably went through a series of questions so you could find out a little bit more about each other. Next you say something like, "We should go do something sometime. In Sales - Heres News You Can Use Here's an idea on how to make reading the daily newspaper a source for new selling ideas. Make it a point to identify at least one thing that you can use in your business whenever you read the newspaper. More Sales with Less Selling Have you ever passed by a bakery display case without feeling the urge to buy at least one cookie, dessert or cinnamon bun? Have you ever taken a child into a candy store and not had them ask to buy at least one of their favorite sweets?The smell of fresh baked goods and the memory of the taste of a candy bar makes us want to buy more. The owners of bakeries and candy stores don't have to spend a lot of time extolling the merits of their goods or the length of time they've been in business; they can concentrate on helping us satisfy our appetites. Cross-selling for Increased Sales, Profits, and Customer Satisfaction Cross-selling - the art of selling for non-salespeopleCross-selling is the act of selling related products at the time and point of sale. Here's a couple of examples:You buy trousers, the salesperson offers you the shirt, tie, cufflinks, shoes?You buy a computer, the sales person offers you a printer, scanner, software? When done well cross-selling will dramatically improve your sales, profits and customer satisfaction. You Dont Love Your Kids if You Dont . . . "You don't love your kids if you don't buy my vacuum cleaner." The salesman looked me right in the eye and didn't even flinch. 12 Sure-Fire Steps To Improve Your Retail Sales The purpose of any business is to bring in customers, and it can only be accomplished through marketing. If your cash registers don't ring, something is wrong and you had better find out what is wrong fast. Let Your Weaknesses Increase Your Sales Imagine.. Make More Sales By Airing Your Dirty Laundry There's an old saying, "Don't air your dirty laundry".If you're selling any product or service either online or offline this is horrible advice.